THE STORY:
After a gunman breaks into the house on Ashley’s (Olivia DeJonge) babysitting job, Luke (Levi Miller) helps her evade detection. But is there something about the break-in that he isn’t telling her? This isn’t exactly how she planned to spend her Christmas break!
I’ll be the first admit that evil kids can be freaky. The first Omen scared the shit out of me when I was but a wee bairn. The second one wasn’t a day at the beach either! And don’t get me started on the little girl from 30 Days of Night. However, in the case of Better Watch Out, they’re just a couple of little twerps.
The more I cringed at every voice crack omitted by Levi Miller’s character, the more my suspension of disbelief as well as the movie’s premise became threadbare. I mean, who would be dumb enough to fall for this shit? I know the babysitter’s blonde, but come on!
Aside from Luke’s parents, most of the people in this movie are forgettable. How do I know this? Because it wasn’t until after that I realised that the babysitter and Luke’s best friend had previously played brother and sister in M. Night Shyamalan’s The Visit. How quickly those memories were unceremoniously shat out of my brain!
That said, Patrick Warburton I just find to be effortlessly funny in everything he does. And who would deny the talent of Virginia Madsen. What I found to be refreshing was that she actually looked like a mother in this movie, which only added to her role. If only their involvement could’ve been greater.
New Power Ranger Dacre Montgomery makes an appearance as babysitter’s boyfriend no.2, Jeremy. It’s a crappy little role that we’re not given enough reason to care about. He’s simply there to add to the movie’s small body count. It’s most likely the least plausible scene of them all. If I were Dacre, I’d give my agent a quick shot to the nuts for this one.
LAST WORDS:
Despite the snow and tree lights, the decorations, the carollers, that Christmas feeling just isn’t there. It’s a soulless affair, really. All just for show. And what a silly show it is. Oh, and if you’re going to test a Home Alone myth, give us the results!